It was focused on the mystery of why Kelly Chase and me, Kelly Eng, didn’t share the same fabulous Caucasian face and nose despite our shared first name. So, was my granny’s concern focused on whether Ms Chase would survive? No. Circa 1988, Kelly and her fellow townspeople were trying to avoid being the next victim of the ‘Salem Slasher’ serial killer. The latter featured a character named Kelly Chase, a former nurse and a svelte blonde stunner.
Her life was arranged around her obsession with US daytime soaps, especially The Bold and the Beautiful and Days of our Lives. My maternal grandmother was another source of nose-ism. Then I’d fix him with a deathly stare, let rip a succession of rapid nostril flares and flounce off to play with my pretty-nosed dollies. After his pincer move, I’d launch my counter-attack, pressing my nose down so hard that it was practically concave. As I protested (in such nasal tones I sounded like Fran Drescher from The Nanny), he mimed with jokey menace that the peg was next. He’d routinely place his index finger on one nostril, a thumb on the other and give it a good one-minute squeeze. But it became apparent very early that other people did.Īlthough we didn’t speak the same language, you didn’t need subtitles to work out that my paternal grandfather wasn’t a fan of my nose. It worked perfectly well – it sniffed things, wrinkled in disgust, sneezed and performed other critical nasal functions such as facilitating breathing. I never really gave it much thought as a pre-schooler.
My nose is a big, fat, flat Chinese nose.
0 kommentar(er)
